Our society has been conditioned to blame the victim and to look for reasons why the victim provoked the abuse, instead of focusing on the actions of the abuser. If we, as a society, don’t look for reasons why the abuse happened, then the world is too scary.
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Expect him to be the emotional roller coaster that he is and plan for it. When he does something good for the kids, chalk it up as a good day and roll with it. When he doesn’t, you’ve already planned for it and it doesn’t rock you to your core.
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Learning to ask for and accept help can be a way to heal from the past trauma of abuse. It can be a way to heal from hyper independence and teach your kids how to have healthy relationships. This post explores the why and how of asking for help.
One of the biggest things that propels me and fuels me both in my life is to help mommas like you get themselves unstuck, especially in the areas where the ex has you paralyzed. Sharing custody sucks even if you have a healthy co-parenting relationship, let alone something completely toxic and imbalanced.
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Single Mom life is difficult. No question. Sometimes you struggle in certain areas - financially, relationally, dealing with a lack of support. These things happen, but do you find yourself believing that this is who you are?
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