Our society has been conditioned to blame the victim and to look for reasons why the victim provoked the abuse, instead of focusing on the actions of the abuser. If we, as a society, don’t look for reasons why the abuse happened, then the world is too scary.
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Knowing that narcissists will never stop, it’s critical that you and I decide to take control of everything we can—countering the abuse of us and empowering our kids to do the same.
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Expect him to be the emotional roller coaster that he is and plan for it. When he does something good for the kids, chalk it up as a good day and roll with it. When he doesn’t, you’ve already planned for it and it doesn’t rock you to your core.
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Everything was piling up and weighing on me, and one day I just couldn’t hold it in anymore. I sat down on the floor and sobbed. It all came crashing down on me and I couldn’t hide the feelings like I usually did.
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"How can I have been so stupid?"
Have you asked yourself that? Thinking it, likely saying it a lot, especially after you come to the knowledge of the truth of what you've been dealing with in your narcissist ex-husband. Realizing, like I did, that he's been lying to me for 20 years!
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